Graffiti Writer

Four Word by Clive Barker:

“Leave me alone, Spanner.” – Clive Barker.

Introduction:

Cheers Clive mate.

So, welcome to my portfolio. Before we begin – yes, my real name is Spanner. It’s a long, but regrettably uninteresting, story and I’ve already heard that joke you just thought of. On the plus side, a name like mine comes with built in chat up lines, and when combined with my racing snake physique it’s made for an adventurous life without the terrible woes of loneliness (fiction, a speciality). Graffiti Writer is the company name under which I operate.

I’m a full-time, self-employed, over-hyphenated freelance writer. I specialise in script writing, though my non-fiction portfolio seems to be rapidly expanding beyond containment. This website includes examples (new, old and irrelevant) of my written work, intended to yield an embarrassment of riches by persuading you to embrace me into your professional bosom.

You can find your way around the site either by accident and random clicking (recommended), or by using the links at the very top and in the columns below. If you’re a bit steady (mentally speaking) and can’t find anything, there’s also a search box up at the top. If there’s something of relevance I think you should know about, or I’ve done something skill and want to blow a trumpet, there’ll be a comments box underneath the page you’re looking at, so do check ‘em out – they’re likely to be far more fascinating and spontaneous than the samples. If you feel so inclined, you can register and post comments on my comments and in the Graffiti Blog section.

I love to get phone calls and emails, so after you’ve enjoyed a virtual stroll around my cyber-psyche it’d be great to hear from you, even if it’s just to tell me you think my portfolio’s weird and inappropriate. I find impropriety to be very funny so do let me know, and if it wouldn’t kill ya, try and throw a bit of work my way, eh? On with the show!

Spanner.